Offered by Cindy Morrone
If I have told my daughters once, I have told them thousands of times, “Only learn from my good stuff; don’t repeat my bad stuff.” One of my biggest fears of all time is passing onto my daughters my ‘baggage’. Whether this is because of infertility and actually having the opportunity to parent two, very precious souls or whether this is a conviction of every Mom or something else; I am not sure. But the passing on of my rubbish is something I fight against every day. I can confess as Paul does, “I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.” (Romans 7:18)
When they were younger it seemed I could hide my selfish ways better, however the older they get and the more time spent together my sin is exposed exponentially. There just seems there is no hiding place left. They see my vain attempts to make my fleshy thoughts and behaviours obedient under the guise of having it all together. And as my attempts fail, guilt and condemnation seals the hopeless ends.
I am so thankful for a conversation with a friend about this. She could relate and offered an alternative. She said something like this, “We all need Jesus, Cindy, that’s the point. And you couldn’t give your daughters a more incredible gift then letting them see that need in you and letting them see you reach out to Him. Leaving your vain, human attempts at His feet, seeking forgiveness and asking for His help.”
Awww…..a peace that surpasses my understanding and guards my heart and mind in my Jesus (Philippians 4:7).
It’s true, what my friend said. And it’s true that I will always continue to need Jesus. I am thankful I have many opportunities to teach my precious ones how to seek their Jesus because they too, “..fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” (Romans 3:23 & 24)
Thank God, “…the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.” (1 John 1:7) Thank God that it doesn’t end in hopelessness that God can use my ‘baggage’ all for His glory! Stand behind me fear and let the glory of our God be revealed!!!
Dear Heavenly and Gracious Father,
Oh, God, You know my heart. I so long to live for You and You alone and to please You. I love You with all my heart, mind, soul and strength. I can’t even begin to express my thankfulness for the opportunity to be a Mama to these two, incredible, beautiful, precious souls! Yet, I know that I fall so short and I am so sorry and I ask for Your forgiveness. I know Lord, we have had many conversations before that I can’t live up to my expectations but I can live a life full of grace and in power filled by the Holy Spirit. Continue to teach me Lord, continue to show me Your ways, I pray. Amen.