{MOTHER’S DAY SPECIAL EVENT} The Comparison Trap.

Written by: Joceline and Kerrington Sweeney

Original-created directly and personally by a particular artist; Not a copy or imitation.

The Lord has blessed me with three beautiful daughters. It may be because I was a young mom or that I was very naïve, but I assumed my girls would all be very similar. Why not their girls?! Wow, was I wrong!

Moms of both genders can probably see the differences right away, but when it comes to girls, I thought pink, frills and sparkles. I look back now on my pre-assumption and I thank God for showing me the error of my thinking early in my girls’ lives. I would have missed so much!

For the most part my baby girls’ needs were all similar, but as the years progressed and they started to develop their own unique personalities and characters, it became much more evident that their likes and dislikes where so different.

The Lord began to show me to let them lead, step back and watch. I began to “study” them so to speak. I was fascinated at what I was learning. My oldest is very out- going, my middle daughter is quite shy, and my youngest is very bold, but yet so tender. My oldest loves to keep busy and have a large circle of friends, while my middle daughter likes to stay home and prefers a small circle of friends, and my youngest likes to have friends over, but also loves her alone time. My oldest daughter is an excellent writer, she also loves to read!
My middle daughter doesn’t enjoy reading, but is a wonderful artist, loves tools and working on any project with her dad.
My youngest loves to sing, dance and enjoys being read to.

image

I shudder at the thought of how different they would be, if I had not listened to the Lord’s prompting to allow them so show me who they were .What if I thought they should all be like me? Or what if I would have tried to make them all like my oldest? Perhaps with words such as,” Your sister can write how come you can’t write like her? ““Why can’t you make friends like your sister?” I would have missed nurturing the quiet artist inside my middle daughter, who wears her heart on her sleeve, to more than likely become overwhelmed with too many friendships for her to handle. Or if I would have said to my youngest, “Why can’t you just sit still and paint like your sister?” I would have missed all the beautiful song she makes up and sings about Jesus. If I hadn’t listened to the Lord’s leading, this could have become a big problem, as I also homeschool these precious girls. They all have different strengths and weaknesses in their schoolwork. Comparison in this area can be damaging to them so profoundly. Instead I have learned over the years to not major on the minors and let them excel in their own way. One is excellent at math, the others not so much, but yet another is incredible at spelling and one is fascinated with reading. Each with their own distinctive talents, leading them in the direction that the Lord has for them one day.

Even the ways they like spending time with me is very different, my oldest daughter loves to shop and go out for tea, my middle daughter dislikes shopping, but loves to craft with me, and my youngest who also doesn’t care for shopping, loves to be sang to and snuggled.

“That means we will not compare ourselves with each other as if one of us were better and another worse. We have far more interesting things to do with our lives. Each of us is an original.” Galatians 5:26 (The Message)

Today I challenge you not to fall into the comparison trap and miss this incredible opportunity.

I truly believe perceiving our children, not comparing them, but allowing them to become who The Master Artist has created them to be, will shape their lives and their destinies.

image

About Joceline:

Joceline is a happy wife who has been married to her firefighting husband Mark for 18 years. Together they have been blessed with three beautiful daughters, Kerrington who is 16, Ireland who is 13 and Jillianne who is turning 10. All who have been homeschooled since day one. Joceline is actively involved in volunteer work in her home church and in her community. She loves Jesus, reading and really cute scarfs.

image

About Kerrington:

Kerrington is homeschooled and she loves it 😉 She has a burning passion to see Women of all ages rise up and be everything God has called them to be. She adores journaling, shopping, and Star-bucks! She desires to continue following Jesus Christ more and more intimately each day! Her favourite pass time is Blogging on her own Blog…Which you can find here.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s