Written by: Carol Slauenwhite
“For WE are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that WE would walk in them. ” Ephesians 2:10
One of my greatest joys in life is that of being a pastor’s wife. Some of my most challenging times have sprung from that very same role. For 45 years I walked along side my hubby through a journey that took us far beyond ourselves to a higher place in God.
Being a good wife and mother can be difficult. However, when you add to it the role of being a pastor’s wife (under the critical eyes of those who think we should be perfect) life can be very challenging.
When I look back over the years of ministering with David I see a picture that has taken me from living “my” life to that of being a team for Jesus. We have worked together and yet individually to do the will of our Heavenly Father. It hasn’t always been easy. We are so very different in many ways. Some folk have said that my hubby is the head and I am the heart of our ministry. Actually, I think that’s true. As a team I learned long ago that he is very knowledgeable about ministry, people, and SO many things. He knows how to make things work and why and how to do ministry. I, on the other hand, love people and want to be a blessing to others through loving them for the Lord. Over the years I’ve had to fight the feeling of being inadequate for ministry when I compare myself with David. Comparing ourselves with others is a no-no at any time! God calls each of us to be ourselves. At the same time we are to become more and more like Jesus, not like others who we think are more gifted or talented.
In our ministry and our private lives we have walked through many trials, heartbreaks and sorrows. Life has not been easy. The enemy of our soul longs to destroy those who work for the Master. He strikes where he knows it will hurt the most. When you make decisions or interact with others in difficult times you can loose friends and become unpopular. At all times you have to make sure you have the wisdom of God and remember Who you are working for. As a wife I have learned to stand beside my hubby and walk tall when he has been attacked and not to become defensive or bitter.
Most of the time I have learned to be submissive (oops, there’s that terrible word). Someone has to lead and I believe that God has made the husband as the head of the home as well as our ministry. Therefore, in honour preferring one another he leads and I follow (most of the time, unless I’m feeling carnal). I do have my ministries within the body and in my own right am a leader as well.
Actually, I just realized I could write a book on this topic. However, I’m limited but I do want to say this. Being married and in ministry has made me who I am today. We have been on an incredible journey. He has taken the broken pieces of our lives, as we’ve served Him together, and used us to bring glory to His name. We’ve ministered for Jesus because “we” were “called” to minister to our generation. However, it isn’t what we have done that matters the most but it’s what we, as a team and as individuals, have allowed Him to make out of our lives.
Carol Slauenwhite’s love for the Lord has taken her to Africa as a missionary, to 7 churches as a pastor’s wife and to the District Office as a Superintendent’s wife. Her love for God, His church and for the ministry has been her passion. The Lord has blessed her with a wonderful husband, 2 precious children, a beautiful daughter-in-love and 3 amazing grandchildren.