{Marriage} Plank plucking

By: Cindy Morrone

He stood there and said, “I will do whatever I need to for my family. This isn’t about me.”

My husband has always been very committed to us. He is a, ‘I love to be at home, more than any other place’ kinda’ guy. Especially of late I have noticed how he lays down his wants and digs right into the everyday, family chaos. He tries so hard to follow the lists and schedules. I have so appreciated his dedication to me and our family and know of the blessing of such devotion.

Regrettably, I have also noticed how critical and unsatisfied I can be. It seems there are some days that he just can’t do enough or what he does do isn’t ‘right enough’. I start to only see the ‘undones’, and the ‘lack thereofs’.

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? “ (Matthew 7:3)

Forgive me Lord….,

It is so much easier to deflect my dissatisfaction, frustrations, and disappointments on someone else’s limitations than my own. And my husband is my closest ‘someone else’. This really isn’t about him at all, but about me and a litany of insecurities disguised in criticisms.

Jesus teaches us that we are first to examine our own planks and pluck them right out!

Some of my planks are:
• Idol worship- anyone or anything other than my God to be my All in all
• Over commitment
• A need to be thankful instead of complaining
• Reliance on self
• Unforgiveness and holding onto an offense
• Selfish motives

It is when I close my eyes, to his sawdust and go to my heavenly Father to help me with plank removal, that I see things more clearly. With clearer vision, my connection with my husband remains and I stop holding him accountable for things that are not his to bear.

Dear Heavenly and Gracious Father,
Hallowed be thy Name! Thank You for the beautiful gift of marriage; to have a committed relationship to share in each other’s messes. “Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.” (Matthew 6:12 & 13) Help us Lord to first examine our own hearts with You and with Your sweet, holy conviction, change our ways for the betterment of all those around us, especially in our marriages. Amen.

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