Written by: Sarah Walker
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?” Matthew 6:25-34
Upon hearing her say something truly horrible to her brother, I rushed into my daughter’s room to give her a stern talking-to. I threw open the door, finger raised, voice strong and brow furrowed.
After I was finished my speech, she looked up at me and said, “Mommy, you have lines on your face. That means you are getting OLD!” Leave it to a preschooler to tell it to you straight!
Later that week, I was getting ready for church. My hair appointment to get my highlights done had been cancelled a few weeks prior and moved to a later date. As I did one last look in the mirror before leaving, I noticed a handful of grey hairs showing up within my roots. Not one, not two, but a handful!
“And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black…” (Matthew 5:36)
That week, it was painstakingly obvious that I am indeed getting older – and that I have no control over this process!
As we prepare for my daughter to head off to school for the first time this fall, questions and fears circle through my mind. Will she be ok without me there to help her? Will she make the right friends? Will she be safe outside at recess? Will she eat all of her lunch? What will she be learning, outside of my control?
How easy it is to agonize over the “what if’s!” I sometimes think it would be so much easier if I were always with her, trying to oversee and control every little thing within her life. I want her to always be happy, I don’t want her feelings to get hurt, I don’t want her to struggle or suffer in any way. But even now with her still at home, even when I am always with her, I still can’t control what she or others are going to say and do, like when she is mean to her brother.
This is where I need to put my hope and trust in God.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
“Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.” Psalm 139:16
Before I even knew my children, God knew them and had plans for them. His word is filled with wonderful truths about his love, care and promises for them.
Just as it has become very clear that I can’t control my hair changing colours or the lines on my face, I also can’t control her thoughts or actions. Thankfully, God is in control where I am not, and I can trust that he loves her even more than I do.
With that thought, my gray-haired head can lay down and sleep peacefully!