{Marriage} Help Mate.

Written by: Melissa Lefevers

“Love is patient, love is kind.” 1 Corinthians 13:4a.

Six words is all that is in that sentence and oh how it speaks volumes! We often think of the “love chapter” in 1 Corinthians as only for marriage. In fact, this chapter of love is directly correlated to our service.


If we have faith that could move mountains but we do not love we again nothing. (13:2) If we give all we have and boast about it and do not love we gain nothing. (13:3) If we serve others, live our life giving all we are but do it without love, not only do we gain nothing, but we cheat ourselves of a deeper relationship with God. God is love after all. (1 John 4:7) Do I believe we can take this verse and incorporate it into our marriages? Yes, yes we can.

Love is patient, love is kind.” We need patience in our marriages. We need to come alongside our men and be patient with them. Be patient that sometimes it takes them a little longer to catch on to all that is going on in our lives. Patient with them when they cannot decipher the different cries of the baby. Kind when you gave them detailed instructions on what to get at the store and they still get it wrong. Kind when they throw your dry clean only clothes in with the towels. Kind when they are not so kind to us.

Maybe most of all; patient and kind when our man is struggling or going through a rough patch in life. How many times do we feel like we need to be their mother and not their help mate? We often like to tell our husbands what to do. How they need to fix the struggle. What we would do if we were them. The funny thing is, often times all they need is us to be patient and kind. Love is patient, Love is kind.

Love is patient. Love is taking your man by the hand and walking with him through it. Love is kind. Love is holding him to your heart a little tighter and praying for God to do a work in him. Love is digging in a little deeper and giving a little more of yourself. Love is putting him first. Love is patient and kind.

I cannot help but be reminded of Adam and Eve. The very first couple to be. I think of how God created them both. My favorite part of the story found in Genesis 2:20-22 is that God knew it was not good for Adam to be alone.

But for Adam not suitable helper was found. So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he has taken out of the man, and brought her to the man.”

Ladies no suitable helper from all the beast God had made was good enough for Adam. So out of God’s love for him he created woman. A woman to be by his side and be his helper. God created us as women to walk hand in hand alongside our men as a help mate. We are to be the kind of helpmate that is patient and kind.

What do you think would happen in our marriages if we quit wondering who was right or wrong and focused on being patient and kind? What do you think would happen in our marriages if instead of being envious, and bitter we were patient and kind? I think we would all be the kind of helpmate God has all along intended for us to be.

For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united with his wife, and they will become one flesh. Genesis 2:24

Two become one and they can handle anything that happens in life by walking hand in hand with each other and God. When we walk through rough times, or watch our sweet man walk through them let’s take them by the hand and be patient and kind.


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